That was one of the things she needed, to be honest. That reassurance that what she was doing wasn't throwing away her future and happiness by not trying was invaluable, even though clearly she was trying.
"I'm scared." The confession comes after a second, and she frowns a little, looking down at her knees. "There was this thing, I... uh. I wrote Joel this letter-" She rubs the back of her neck with a hand. "I just keep being in these places where I don't know if I'm going to make it out, and it's so hard-"
Pulling in a deep breath, she takes another stab at finding the right words. "I don't want to be alone because I didn't do something I should have been doing," she says finally, and then she clears her throat. "So... thank you. For your advice, it's... it's really helpful, and it makes me feel better."
They move on, and it's when he heaves himself up beside her that Raleigh looks over at him. "Living with you is probably the best thing that ever happened to me," she said quietly. "I know that I don't talk about my family much, but... it was kind of messed up, and living with you... I feel like-" She chews on her lip, and she tries to find the right words, so she can make him understand. "When I lived with my mom and Matt, and even when I was in college because I still like, sent my money home and stuff, I was doing what I did for them. I mean, I was in pre-med. Me, pre-med, and I don't even want to be a doctor! It was because my mom needed me, and that's what I could do, I thought, and she never ever told me I had to do what I did for her, but somebody had to take care of her and my brother when my dad left, you know?"
She paused, and tried to figure out how to say this the right way. "Living with you is the first time that I've been able to actually do what makes me happy and have support doing it. We're- We're a family, and it's- It's this good thing where all of us hold each other up and we have good things and bad things, but we're all together, and I am so thankful for that. You have been so giving, and- the reason I ask, the reason I ask every couple of months and why I honestly don't know if I'll ever stop asking every now and again is because if it changes- just, for space reasons, or... whatever, even though I love the house, and I love my room, and I love waking up every morning and knowing that I'm going to see people I care about, I would so much rather it just be out in the open and that it doesn't do anything to the family part of it." She leans forward just a little so she can catch his eye. "Because that's what's important, not so much where I actually live." She bumps her shoulder into his, hoping he understands what she means, not that she's thinking he's going to throw her out on her ear one of these days.
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"I'm scared." The confession comes after a second, and she frowns a little, looking down at her knees. "There was this thing, I... uh. I wrote Joel this letter-" She rubs the back of her neck with a hand. "I just keep being in these places where I don't know if I'm going to make it out, and it's so hard-"
Pulling in a deep breath, she takes another stab at finding the right words. "I don't want to be alone because I didn't do something I should have been doing," she says finally, and then she clears her throat. "So... thank you. For your advice, it's... it's really helpful, and it makes me feel better."
They move on, and it's when he heaves himself up beside her that Raleigh looks over at him. "Living with you is probably the best thing that ever happened to me," she said quietly. "I know that I don't talk about my family much, but... it was kind of messed up, and living with you... I feel like-" She chews on her lip, and she tries to find the right words, so she can make him understand. "When I lived with my mom and Matt, and even when I was in college because I still like, sent my money home and stuff, I was doing what I did for them. I mean, I was in pre-med. Me, pre-med, and I don't even want to be a doctor! It was because my mom needed me, and that's what I could do, I thought, and she never ever told me I had to do what I did for her, but somebody had to take care of her and my brother when my dad left, you know?"
She paused, and tried to figure out how to say this the right way. "Living with you is the first time that I've been able to actually do what makes me happy and have support doing it. We're- We're a family, and it's- It's this good thing where all of us hold each other up and we have good things and bad things, but we're all together, and I am so thankful for that. You have been so giving, and- the reason I ask, the reason I ask every couple of months and why I honestly don't know if I'll ever stop asking every now and again is because if it changes- just, for space reasons, or... whatever, even though I love the house, and I love my room, and I love waking up every morning and knowing that I'm going to see people I care about, I would so much rather it just be out in the open and that it doesn't do anything to the family part of it." She leans forward just a little so she can catch his eye. "Because that's what's important, not so much where I actually live." She bumps her shoulder into his, hoping he understands what she means, not that she's thinking he's going to throw her out on her ear one of these days.